RIP, Ibienu Shiekha Naseh..

30th of August 2011
I can't believe I am about to post this right now.
I'm already prepared a lot of things to post on this blog later but now I got thing to tell you.

today. 12:34pm. a text came up on my phone screen.
+628583xxxxx
Fiss, innalilahi wainna ilaihi rajiun..
Telah meninggal dunia kawan qt yg qt sayangi..

Ibnu Shieka

Selamat jalan sobat, thanks for coloring our life :(
Nanda

I am shocked.
until the time when I type this, I still can't believe that Ibienu Shieka Naseh is gone.

he is another great friend God sent to me.
if you ever read a post that I posted on valentine this year, you'll see pictures of us. me, nanda, and ibienu.

first time we talked is on twitter.
I saw Nanda and Ibi tweeted to each other.
but they were talking about our university, so I joined the conversation. :')

from that day on, we are following each other (on twitter).
he is a funny guy.
like, real funny.

first time we met was when he wanted to find a girl who studying at the same university with me and nanda (me and nanda are students of Gunadarma and Ibi is a student of Bina Sarana Informatika).
so he arranged a 'meeting' with me. he came with his friend. he was late at first and I am so mad because of that.
but it doesn't matter, we were keep going on our plan.
:')

I didn't tell him about my past.
but he sure knows all the boys problem about me.
he knows about the Mr. 7 Years. he knows about Yoga. he knows about my man now.

sometimes I asked him for advice.
and sometimes, I followed his advice. ;)

I remember when I had a fight with my friend just because a picture.
I told him about it, and his respon was like 'eew, forget him. we're hanging out and taking thousands of pictures and I won't be mad.'
that will never happen. but I thank him for that. :')

I just never thought that 14th of February of 2011 will be the first and last meet of the 3 of us. :'(

I love Ibi. he's like a brother for me.

thanks Ibi, for everything. for those advice and those laughs.
RIP Ibienu Shieka Naseh.
my pray will always be with you.

#hugandkiss

I had a dream about you again, hitam.
This time, nothing bad happens.
Even, I can say it's beautiful..

You and me were neighbors on my dream.
But I never see you around.

One day, my place burned to the ground.
But the presents I'm about to give you are in a good condition.

I have no idea what was that means.
But I woke up with this happy feeling because I did hold you close in my arms.

I love you, hitam.
Don't make me worry about you.

fuck yeah, I'm a liar

yeah, you're right. I lie to you. I am a big fat liar.
you want to know things that I lied about?
1. I am happy.
2. I'm excited to get back home.
3. I need no one.
4. I'm friendly.
5. I'm awesome.
6. I'm smart.
7. I wanted to watch Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Part 2.
8. I love my stepfather.
9. I hate kids.
10. I like staying up late.
11. I love talking to strangers.
12. I am not scared to death.
13. I like hanging out.
14. I'm cute.
15. My mom loves me.
16. My family proud of me.
17. I love spending holidays with my mom and sister in my hometown.
18. HOME is the most comfortable place on earth.
19. I never wanted to leave this country.
20. I'm not racist.
21. I'm in a good health.
22. I'm fine.
23. Leave me if you want because I don't care.
24. You're just someone who makes me laugh. I just need your joke.
25. I don't remember anything about you.
26. I never really cared when my man is sick.
27. No, he doesn't make me cry.
28. I'm tough as rocky mountain.
29. I put a big evil laughing on my face when I type this.
30. I am proud of myself.
31. I always love fuck up.
32. I love loving life.
33. I love schools.
34. I can kill somebody when I am really mad.
35. I like perfumes.
36. I believe in true love.
37. I've got used to be cursed.
38. I hate writings.
39. I never get jealous.
40. I don't care what my man did or whom he's with.

and you know what are my biggest lies, man?

I don't love you. I never loved you or cared about you. I hate it when I had to woke up every 4 hours. I am happy when you're not here. I was not really cry when I saw you sick. it's okay with me if you blocked me from your accounts. I'm not mad when you're not replying my e-mails.

now you happy? YOU HAPPY?
because I AM. I AM REALLY HAPPY FOR BEING SUCH A GREAT LIAR.

Don't Feel Like Going Home

it's august and my holiday will end in about... a month, 2 weeks and 1 day.
my mom knows I have nothing to do here, so she told me that I better going back home.
I am excited about learn how to drive, but what if I can drive in a week? I will have 3 boring weeks.

honestly readers, I don't like my house now. it's different. my mom has changed a lot of stuff in that house. it's not that comfortable anymore.

but I don't know. I think I'll still going back. on this 15.
and will be back here (if I will) on September 15th.

I mean, I still have 10 days here.